Give Me Something

Hello Bloggers!


Hmmm. I am terrible at blogging. I realized today that I haven't been blogging. But I haven't been running either. I am living in shame of you guys! Nah. I am just kidding. I am just...working through my running right now. Don't worry everyone. I don't give up on goals. Sometimes you have to adjust your goals, but that doesn't mean that I am going to give up. So hang in there with me. Cause if you have the patience to hang in there with me and put up with all my antics, then I know that you will glad that you did. So hang in there with me readers!!


So, as you all know, my biggest motivation is my grandfather. There are some days where I just feel sad, or peaceful, or reserved. And sometimes it takes me a minute to figure out why. I am programmed to take an emotional hit, grieve for a few days, then get up and move on. It's something that I have to do. I push that panic of depression and grief away and I live my life. But there are some days where I just can't do that. Every time I touch my violin. Every time I drive his car. Every time I see an old man with his granddaughter. I have grandparent envy! I really do. I carry this around with me always, but I don't share it. 


So, yesterday, the new O.A.R album was released. FYI all you west coasters/O.A.R newbs: O.A.R. is the best band ever. Period. No argument. And they scarily know my life. Well, tonight, a friend pointed out that one of the bonus tracks is about the main artist losing his grandfather. It's a perfect song. Half of it is instrumental, which I love (being a violinist, I tend to focus more on the music than the lyrics), but then the lyrics say exactly what I have been feeling and carrying around with me since the morning I woke up and knew Nonno was gone. I knew before my mom even called me, and I was 2,000 miles away. This song pretty much says it all. Though it makes me sad, I love being able to hear what I feel. If that makes any sense. But pretty much, I love O.A.R. and sometimes, music is what saves me. And I will always love my Nonno. I will carry the happiness I had with him around with me everywhere. But I will also carry the sadness of losing him.


 Grief doesn't go away just because a person stops talking about it. Sometimes I wonder if people can see it in my eyes. I feel like I carry so much loss with me, and I wonder if anyone can see. And then I realize...it doesn't matter. It's like what Albus Dumbledore says, "Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, especially those who live without love". It's true. But anyways. I thought I would share this song. I am going to post it in my favorite music section. If I can figure it out. 


Summer is almost over. And then it is back to Utah. Back to cold. I am going to cling to this miserable humidity as long as possible. Haha.


Lesson #5: Always hang on to the good. Even when you are sinking in the abyss of depression, count all the little good things that happen in one day and add them all together until you can see happiness in the world again. 


Happy Running! 

It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live!

Hello Bloggers!


Running starts back up this week. I think I am gonna be alright. I was thinking of setting my marathon goal for April. There is a marathon out in Utah that I can run, so I think I am going to start with that and go from there!


Alright, so I realized that I never talked about the Harry Potter premiere! It was amazing. Me, my sister, and my best friend all dressed up and went together. It was amazing. My sister dressed up as Luna Lovegood (sometimes it is scary how alike they are), my best friend dressed up as Waldo (and she had a wand, so I think she really threw some people off their game that night haha), and I dressed up as Lilly Potter (Harry and Ginny's daughter). I have red hair and harry potter glasses...I felt it was appropriate.

Me, Carlie, and Katie

Me and Katie


We had way too much fun. Now please take note of my shoes! I bought myself glittery toms. Yes, I know. For those who know me and my admimate determination to never buy a pair of toms well...I caved. Haha. I now own not one, not two, but three pairs of toms. I am a shoe addict, just by the way. I am on the hunt for a fourth pair of times, but they are sold out everywhere in my size, so I am still on the hunt. No worries. I have all the patience in the world when it comes to buying a pair of shoes. So here are pictures of my three new toms that I own. I really gotta stop buying shoes. Haha. But they make me so happy! Plus, my best friend Camie wanted to me put pictures of them up on my blog so she could judge them, and I obediently listened! Speaking of Camie...SHE IS COMING TO VISIT ME! I am so excited. She is coming here to Atlanta, which is amazing. We are going to have the best week ever. And then after she leaves, it's time for me to pack up my bags and join her back out at school. It's been a crazy and pretty crappy summer, so I am looking forward to going back. But I am going to miss my family and the support they provide. And trees. I really miss the trees while I am at school. 


Well bloggers, I think I have said enough. I hope you are having a fantastic Sunday. Here is lesson #4: true friends are always there for you. Simple as that. Don't fret about the friends you've lost....dwell on the friends you have gained. 


Happy Running!

When you fail, try try again

Hello Bloggers!


It has been 2 whole weeks since I last ran. I think I am going to attempt a short run tomorrow. The last asthma attack I had left me really sick for over a week, and now I am just scared to run. Unfortunately, I think I am going to have to withdraw from the marathon this October. BUT! I am not giving up. It's just not enough time for me to train and do well. I have an asthma condition. I didn't develop it until I was 18. It hasn't even been 2 years since my first attack! I am still trying to get used to it and get it under control. See how bad it actually is. I am going back to the specialist to get help and figure out what I can do. 


I find myself missing running, but my fear is winning today. It is scary not being able to breathe, and it is scary when it takes days for my lungs to feel better. This week, I am just trying to figure out if it is worth making me sick. So tomorrow I am going to go for a short run and see what happens. Right now, my goal is a half marathon. I think that's more realistic for now. And come on bloggers, I have plenty of time in my life to train for a marathon. The point of this challenge was to give me something to do, a goal to work towards. And it has accomplished that. Now I need to be realistic. 


Last week, I had the opportunity to spend a lot of one on one time with my grandmother. She is one tough lady, and one of my most favorite people in my life. She has such a kind and gentle soul. With her in the house, everything was alright. She told me many stories of my grandfather. She misses him, as do I. I sometimes wonder what he would tell me to do about this marathon. I think he would tell me to try. To not give up, but to be smart. This is similar advice that my daddy gave me. The problem is my pride. I have lots of it. But my dad is right. I can't push myself to do something if I am not ready. If I am not healthy enough. So my pride has to be pushed aside, and my dad gets a point. I figured he could use a shout out on my blog, since all he has been is a support during this whole adventure. And I know he will continue to be, as long as I do it in a smart and healthy way. 


Bloggers, don't ever give up on what you want to do. Trust me, I know life can be hard. This summer has been really hard for me. There have been trials, tears, injuries, and disappointment. But I have to keep moving on. Go for a run, take a yoga class, go for a walk. Find something that makes you happy and gives you inner peace. Hang in there bloggers!


Happy running! 

Day Whatever and He Who Shall Not Be Named

Hello Bloggers!


Well...the worst thing has happened. I had a MASSIVE asthma attack last week. It was my second one in a week, and the worst I have ever had. So I am out of commission this week. I can't stop coughing/wheezing. So I gotta get that under control. 


There are only a few things getting me through this crap of a situation:
1. In 2 days, it is the final showdown against He Who Shall Not Be Named. I am so excited (said in the same sing song voice that Rachel just used. Yes, we are skyping as I type this)
2. I have awesome Harry Potter glasses that I am going to wear, complete with my wand that I procured from Harry Potter World this summer.

Aren't they amazing?

3. I just found out that my best friend Camie is coming to see me in August. So excited!!!!!

5. I jail broke my phone to be harry potter themed so it says "Alohomora" to unlock it and "Mischief Managed" to lock it. It is Harry Potter obsession week. Back off.

4. I have chocolate covered pretzels downstairs.

Pretty much, my life is being held together by Harry Potter and airplane tickets. It's great. I am gonna go see my asthma doctor to try to get my asthma under control. But if I can't...the marathon is gonna have to be put on hold. I will keep ya'll updated.

Happy Running and Happy Breathing!

Week 5...How did I get this far?

Hello bloggers! So today my dad asks me why I haven't been running. He thought I hadn't gotten my miles in this week. Perhaps because I have been so negligent on my blog? It is a possibility. Haha. Well anyways, I did indeed run all of my miles. Well actually, I haven't run my 9 miles but I am tomorrow. This weekend got away from me. And besides, I kinda like the weekend for recovery. And this schedule is flexible, so no judgements! Haha. 


Last weeks runs were AMAZING. Run 5 miles? No big deal. Run 3 miles? Pshhh I can do that in my sleep. I have already been doing this for 5 weeks. I can't believe it. The fact that I can see improvement really helps keep me motivated. I am going to register for a half-marathon for the end of the summer before I go back to school. I feel like it'll be a good stepping stone before the marathon. 


Well everyone, I have to say, I have fallen in love with running. You know why? Running will always be here for me. All I have to do is strap on my shoes and I can go on a run. I can let go of the problems of the world, of my life, of everything that comes crashing down on me. Running has become my outlet. I don't think I can give it up now. I am addicted! 


So here is lesson #2: you can't control what happens to you. People leave you, either by choice, or by tragedy. There is nothing you can do about it. There will be days where the world crashes in around you. But find something and hold onto it. Don't succumb to insecurity or self-doubt. Find something you love and let that heal you. I feel broken today, for many reasons. But I am so grateful that I have found running to help piece myself back together. Between running, great friends, and family, the pieces of my life will always mend back together. I hope all you bloggers find that same comfort. 


Sorry for the change in tone everyone. Just what has been on the brain! Running these many miles gives me WAY too much time to think!


Happy Running! 

Day 18...Run Like You Stole Something

Hello bloggers! Never has the phrase "run like you stole something" seemed more ironic. No, I did not steal anything. My car was broken into last night. Yup, I am an idiot and left my purse in my car. 2 other cars in my neighborhood were broken into, 10 total for my area. Crazy! But what is done is done, so I am just gonna learn my lesson and move on!


So as you can tell readers, today was stressful. I mean, come on, can I catch a break? Haha. So I passed out for 4 hours in the most glorious nap I have taken in awhile and woke up too late to run. I hate to sound paranoid, but tonight, I didn't feel safe running at 10 at night like I did just the other day. And I live in a safe neighborhood/area! Just gotta let the jitters out and it'll be all good.


I am a little nervous about my fundraising. Cause...there has been none so far. I really need help promoting my cause! Help!


Tomorrow I will do my 4 miles from today. I think I just like this schedule better. I am so scared of being injured or having an asthma attack that I don't wanna push it. Looks like this week, I have to work through fear. Be more secure with myself. I am telling ya, this really is a journey!


Happy Running Everyone! And don't forget to bring in all belongings from your car! Peace!

Day 17...Not So Great!

Hello Bloggers. It has been 17 days already! 2 1/2 weeks into this beast! Well everyone...I am officially registered in the Marine Corps Marathon! Wahoo! Now I just need to raise $750 for the Make A Wish foundation and I will be golden! I am going to need all the help I can get, so every dollar counts!


Well, today was a hard run. Not as easy as last nights run. I had my first asthma attack since being home. But it's not a big deal. I was able to finish my 3 miles and then get home and take my medicine before it escalated too far. It is frustrating because I am doing everything I can to control it, but it's never enough. I will work through it. I am committed to this now! I have to keep running. Gotta keep doing my miles.


I also bought a swim suit so that I can do my laps on cross training days! Woo! Moving ahead. Other than running, I am just working and hanging around my family. I saw two of my friends today, so that was way fun! But it's summer, so people go out of town, some of my friends live across the country...some nights, it gets lonely! I am currently waiting to skype Rachel again. Because I miss having her live right down the hall from me! Haha. Pathetic, I know.


I am posting the link for my donation page here on my blog. It would really mean a lot to me if you would donate, even if it is just a dollar. I have seen how the Make A Wish foundation has changed children's lives. They give children what they need most: hope. Please help me help a child! Oh, and help me put that 26.2 bumper sticker on my car!
Donation Page


Happy running! Peace!

Day 16 and Oh So Great!

Hello bloggers! All I have to say is WOW. This is the run I have been waiting for. The run where I can feel my body getting in shape The run where I don't think about every step I am taking, trying to push myself through the run, but the run where I think about fundraising, and what running the actual marathon feels like. It was a solid run. Hey, not bad for an asthmatic with a bruised tailbone and a pulled groin muscle. I guess my body is used to performing with pain. I guess all those years dancing on a bum hip actually came in handy. Haha. 


So bloggers, this leaves me to one conclusion: I CAN run this marathon in October. Not only can I run a marathon in October, I can run the Marine Corps Marathon. Yes, I can. Sure, I am not running super long distances yet, but my body is getting into shape. I can get used to running 26.2 miles. I can do this. But not without your help. I am going to email the Make a Wish Foundation and see if they will sponsor me. This late in the game, the only way to get a race number is to run for a charity and have them sponsor you. So this means fundraising. I have to raise a minimum of $750. Not too bad. It will be donated to a child in the D.C. to help one of their wishes come true. I will post more information about it tomorrow. I will also post a donation page. Any donation is welcome. Remember, I will not be getting any money out of this. It will all go straight to Make a Wish foundation. Well bloggers, can you help my wish to put that 26.2 sticker on  my car come true?  


Happy Running! Peace!

Hello Again, It's Been So Long

Hello bloggers! Sorry I haven't been updating. The truth is...there hasn't been much to update. This was a bad running week. I got off my schedule because I had to go to a funeral, so I only did half of my running requirement. And you know what bloggers? I bet I could've found the time to crank out my miles, but you know what? I am tired. Emotionally tired. This week, I just didn't have the mental strength to push through those miles. And next week I may have to pay the consequences of that, but you know what? It is a new week. This week, it is ok that I am sad and grieving. Next week, I will pull myself up and keep on running. Next week schedule:


Monday: break
Tuesday: 3 mile run
Wednesday: 4 mile run
Thursday: 3 mile run
Friday: Off
Saturday: 5 miles
Sunday: Cross train 


Ready. Set. Go.


Happy Running! Peace!

6 Miles on Day 6!

Hello bloggers! I RAN 6 MILES TODAY!!!!! And guess what ya'll? I only walked not even half a mile. I just got on a roll and just kept going. I hit a point where my legs hurt, my lungs hurt, my feet hurt...but they all hurt in one continuous movement that somehow propelled me 6 miles. It really gave me hope for running longer distances. 

This week is going to be a hard running week, not because of miles but because of time. But the schedule is this:

Monday: Rest

Tuesday: Run 3 miles

Wednesday: Run 3 Miles

Thursday: Run 3 Miles

Friday: Rest

Saturday: Run 7 miles (one mile increase)

Sunday: Cross train

Another 3 mile week, but it will increase the further into this adventure that I get.

Ok ya'll, I need some advice. I was looking at the USMC Marathon web site last night and I found a loophole to be able to run the race this October. If I run for an organization, I get a registration number. So I was looking at different organizations, and the National Hospice Foundation stuck out to me. I have to fundraise a minimum of $1200, BUT half of my funds will go to a hospice of my choice. I would donate it to the hospice that helped take care of my grandpa in his final months. They truly are angels. So here is the question: can I raise enough money by October 30? And, will I be physically ready to run the USMC marathon? AND I would need to raise/save enough money to fly to D.C. from Utah, where I go to school? These are a few challenges that I have to face, and a few decisions I need to make. But I want to run this marathon, especially now that I have a cause to run for. Any thoughts? What do you think bloggers: would you be willing to help me raise enough money to run this race? Decisions decisions....

Well, I am going to go enjoy my advil/icy hot combination I have going on right now.

Happy Running! Peace!

Day 4: Make Up Run With Some Tears on the Side

Hello bloggers! It is day 4 of this adventure and I made up my miles from yesterday. 3 miles today! And let me tell you, it was a good run. I didn't wanna stop running, but on my way home I ran into my friend Katie...who I was supposed to be hanging out with. Woops. Didn't time that very well! But I figured I would squeeze in a run while I could. Tomorrow I will be doing an hour of cross-training, so I am going to get up tomorrow morning and go do laps in the pool for an hour.

Today was good. Social. I hung out with Lauren, and cheated on my diet by eating frozen yogurt. And then I hung out with Katie and cheated on my diet again by eating ice cream. And I just finished skyping two of my best friends from school, Camie and Celina. I think my friend Rachel is about to get on skype as well, so I can see her wonderous face tonight too!

Overall, I am pretty pumped. My run was good. I am so ready for my 6 mile run on Sunday. I am feeling good. My body is good, and I can feel it getting into shape again.

However, tonight I heard some sad news. I don't want to spend a lot of time talking about it, but I feel like it deserves a shout out. A childhood friend of mine, who acted like my second mother, passed away today from her fight with breast cancer. I ran Race for the Cure in her name last year, along with my grandfather's. She was truly a beautiful soul to have in my life. I will miss her. My tears won't bring her back, and I know that she is in a happier place. I miss her already. My thoughts and prayers go out to her family.

Well, this running adventure continues tomorrow! 

Happy Running! Peace!

Day 3....rained out!

Hello bloggers! So I was planning on going on an evening run tonight, because I love running at night. Well...a freak storm came through my area tonight. I mean, driving home from my brother's baseball game was scary. Let me tell ya! Good thing my mom was driving and not me! That is all I gotta say. I am going to make up my 3 miles tomorrow and run the 6 miles on Sunday morning.


Well since I have no running update for ya'll, I figured I would tell you a little bit about where my inspiration comes from. When I run, I think of many things. I think of what I did during the day, what I need to do later, the concerns and worries in my life, and many other things. But I mostly think about my grandpa. He passed away last October after a 4 year battle with breast cancer. I first started running because I was training for the Air Force ROTC program, which led to me running Race for the Cure with my family. If you don't know anything about race for the cure, well it is a race to help fight breast cancer. It was an amazing run because you are running for a cause.


I miss my Nonno every day. And when I run, I think of everything he taught me in life. When I want to quit on a goal, I think of what he taught me: "Don't do anything unless you can do it right". That doesn't include quitting. I joined the Air Force because I wanted to follow in his footsteps. I wanted to get a glimpse of that love and patriotism he felt for his country. I wanted to continue his legacy, because maybe if I could, I could make him stay with me forever. Well I am no longer in the Air Force. I can't, because of my asthma. But you know what? He is still with me. Every step I take, he is with me. I put on my running shoes every day and I think of him. I run for him. I know he is proud of me, even if I am not in the Air Force. So I am going to run this marathon. I am going to support our troops. I am going to support the legacy he left behind. Because I am my Nonno's granddaughter. And not a day goes by where I don't think of him and smile. I smile because of all the lessons, the love, and the passion that he left behind. He taught me to be a fighter. So I will fight each mile until I can put that 26.2 mile bumper sticker on my car!


Happy Running! Peace!

Day Two

Hello bloggers! Day two is over and finished with. I ran 3.2 miles today on my most favorite route. And let me tell ya. My body is gonna be so in shape by the end of this. How do I know this? Because all of my muscles in my legs are killing me. And it feels glorious! Did I mention that I am an exercise addict?

So my run today was hard. There was one point where I was more than halfway through where I just didn't wanna run anymore. So I stopped, I stretched, I steadied my breathing (I was wheezing a little bit), and friends, I ran every last step of my run! I can totally do this. Just gotta keep up my motivation. I can do it! 

Overall, I am proud of myself. I wanted to give up. My body wanted me to give up. I am sore people! And it was hot! But guess what? I didn't. If I don't give up on myself after 3 miles, then I won't give up on myself after 20 miles. Each week, each run will really suck. It will. But I will look back at each run and say, "I did it". What else could I ask for? 

3 mile run tomorrow and then 6 mile run on Saturday. First week is almost complete!

Happy Running! Peace!

Day One

Hello bloggers! Tonight was the first day of this challenge! Wahoo! So today, I ran 3 miles. I had to take my brother to baseball so I had to run an unfamiliar course...and I realized, I am a creature of habit. It is so much easier to run when you know where you are going. 


So I went to the park across the street from the baseball fields, expecting to find a great 1-2 mile course. So I am running and I kept passing the same pond. Obviously, it was not as long as a course as I thought it was. So I ended up running the streets around the park. Just as effective. I am pretty sure I hit 3 miles. I accidentally turned off the gps tracking feature on my phone....woops :p. But tomorrow morning I am running my 3.2 mile route around my neighborhood.


Lesson #1 that I learned today: running is hard. When it's 92 degrees, you have no idea where you are going, you asthma is acting up, and you just don't want to run anymore, it is hard to keep going. But here's the thing...I just kept going. Was it hard? Of course. But tomorrow will be easier. I just have to keep telling myself that. Tomorrow will be easier. Or it may be harder. Who cares? There is always another day, another run, more miles to complete. 


Overall, good first day. I am still pumped about this challenge, so hopefully my momentum will continue once I get into mileage I have never run before. I run for myself. I run because it is the only thing that makes sense. One foot in front of another. One more mile. Breath. Simple. 


Happy running! Peace!

I'll See You in 20 Miles!

Hello friends! Tomorrow is the big day! Not big mileage, but the start of this big adventure! Wahoo!


Well today, I went shopping for a new running outfit. Trust me, I already have plenty, but my mom always says that buying a new outfit is inspiration. So I sucked it up, spent the money, and am now ready to go. I went to the Big Peach in Winward, and let me tell you, the men who worked there are my new most favorite people. They asked me what I was training for, so I told them 


about this marathon idea. But I 
also told them that I had to buy a new outfit. They laughed and asked me when I could come in to buy a new outfit, you know, as a reward. As I was walking out I said, "I'll see you in 20 miles!". So it looks like 20 miles is my next milestone. Works for me. 




Anyways, not much for ya'll tonight. I am going out with some girlfriends tonight. But tomorrow is when the fun really starts!


Peace!

Real Housewives of Orange County...and oh yeah, running!

Hello bloggers. Countdown till training: 2 days. I just wanna run! But if I can't, then I may as well bum around and watch the Real Housewives of Orange country right? Bumming around as much as I can! Haha.


Just to clarify....a marathon is 26.2 miles. So a half marathon is 13.1 miles. I realized today that I should probably clarify that. Just so ya'll can see just how crazy I am!


Tuesday will be the magical day. I am a novice runner level one. So this week, I am running 3 miles on Tuesday, 3 miles on Wednesday, 3 miles on Thursday, and 6 miles on Saturday. By the end of the program, I will be running 40 miles or more a week. Not sure how I feel about that. My Saturday runs will eventually get up to 20 miles. What do you even think about for 20 miles? "My feet hurt" "wow that tree is really tall" "if I pass out will someone come help me?". Note to self: run with my license.


So here's a thought. I have a hip injury/asthma. So this journey is not going to be an easy one. So I was talking to one of my friends and she suggested I try the barefoot running shoe.

How goofy does this shoe look? Apparently it offers up a lot of support and gives a runner a more natural stride so it helps prevent injury. I just can't decide if I should try this. Thoughts? My real problem is that I just bought the COOLEST new balance running shoes that are heaven on my feet. So I am not sure I want to convert just yet. I am not that legit of a runner yet I suppose :)

Ok so goals have been set! I am going to try to run a half-marathon by the end of the summer before I go back to school, and then I will run my marathon out in Utah in October. It's too late to register for the USMC marathon, but that's ok. I am afraid I am going to become one of those crazy people who just run all the time and travel all over the country to run races. But hey, is that such a bad thing? Let's see how the first week goes, but I am pretty excited. I think I am going to go shopping for a new running outfit. Start this adventure out right!

Well, this entertained me for a solid ten minutes. Let the countdown begin!

Peace!

Why Run?

Hello everyone! First of all, I respect every blogger out there who was able to set up their profile all on their own. I got so frustrated, my little brother Spencer had to take the laptop from me and fix the mess I had created. Oh what would I do without tech savvy siblings??


Anyways, the reason why I went through such a frustrating process is because I have finally joined the blogging community! Wahoo! Why you may ask? Well, I have decided to train for a marathon, and what better motivation than knowing that a whole community of bloggers will be watching me? 


Where I got this crazy idea...


Well, I started running while I was training for the Air Force ROTC program. Unfortunately, I was diagnosed with asthma, so I am no longer in the program. It sucks. But hey, that's life. When life hands you oranges, make orange juice! However, I still love to run, but I haven't had anything to work towards. After reconnecting with my best friend Lauren, I had this great idea! I would train for a marathon, specifically the Marine Corps marathon in Washington D.C.. Lauren is kicking butt in the Marine Corps ROTC, so I decided that my new vendetta would be supporting the Marines (side note: I respect and thank ALL of our troops. Thank you for all that you do!). So this is when I decided that I would do a marathon. 


The internet is an amazing place. I found an 18 week plan to help train me for a marathon. My plan is to do a half marathon and a full marathon before I run the Marine marathon a year from October. Plenty of time to get in shape and build up my endurance. To make sure that I keep my motivation, I decided I would blog about it. This journey is going to be the best, worst, most loved, and most hated thing that I have ever done. And if I have you to share with, I will have to keep running! Otherwise I have to face the walk of shame...via the internet! So stick with me as I embark on the craziest idea of my life!